- Main article: Books (Thieves Guild)
- Location: Thieves Den in Abah's Landing, Hew's Bane
- Author: King Farangel
- Collection: Hew's Bane Bookshelf
This is my first attempt at poetry; history will remember these words.
"Swell the impetuous tides that crash upon your darkened shore. "The lights of your towers rival the stars gleaming in the sky, "Their light doubled in the shadowed bay."
No, that's not it. It's too high-minded. I want this to be something everyone can relate to. Perhaps a song?
"If I had a daughter, I tell you what she'd say, "I want a man of Wayrest, to stay with me all day! "And if I had a son, I tell you he'd be right, "To want a girl of Wayrest, to stay with him all night!"
Uh-oh. This is heading in the wrong direction, fast. What do you think, scribe? Do you have any ideas?
"W is for the city Where I want to be. "A is for the Apple of King Farangel's eye. "Y is for whY would you go to Daggerfall, that stinking, reeking slum."
All right. We're getting nowhere. I think we need to turn this over to the bards.
Why are you still writing? Scribe, I know I told you to write everything down but … look, I'm ordering you on pain of death, stop—