Hey everybody!

I'm back.... again! This time, hopefully for real. So, if you're reading this I probably don't have to give a summary of what I'll be recording here unless you just blindly clicked on the title and are now relentessly refusing to look up. But, just in case you're special like that, today I'll be going over pros and cons of the possible settings for The Elder Scrolls 6: Bob Loblaw. Mostly it will just be provinces and why it'd be cool, and why it either may not happen or wouldn't be as cool. Also, before I begin I just wanna give a big shoutout to Nerevarine465 for getting my gears turning on this subject. His article is a huge influence on this one and is also spectacular, so I suggest you go and read it. Like, now. Stop reading this and come back when yer done. ................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................ Yer done? Good! So, without further ado, let's synopsize it a little more. Hahaha, NO. Let's hop right into it.

The first, and most likely setting, Hammerfell.

So, Hammerfell, homeland of the Redguards and the desert province as I like to call it.

Pros of Hammerfell-

Black people (no racist)!

Cons of Hammerfell-

Black people (lots racist).

Okay, okay. In all seriousness Hammerfell would be a cool place to explore, and it seems like the most likely setting for several reasons, including it being a great place to wage war against the Aldmeri Dominion. In most of this article I will be considering battles against the Dominion as a central feature, as I believe this will be the main story line, or at least closely knit to it. Now, the Alik'r Desert makes an awesome exploring habitat, and it has several dozen ruins of past civilizations buried under it. The problem with it, I feel there might be a lack of diversity. I mean environmentally, of course. Not racially, even though most races aren't adapted for hot, dry air, but that's aside the point. No, no, I feel that the cities may end up all being built from the same material (probably sand) and they'd (a good chunk of them at least) be boring color scheme wise. I mean, picture this.

After months and months of walking through the hot, dry Alik'r Desert, your skin sizzling in the sun's rays, you have finally come across a city, and with it a possible source of stability and water. You walk into the city, made completely out of sandstone, and stock up, rejuvenating yourself as you traverse it. After saying your goodbyes, you depart from the city, and two weeks later after a practically identical situation, you come to another city that looks exactly like the last one. Like, literally, what the fuck?!

Okay, okay, I know they have plenty of resources, and there are in fact grassy areas, but the entire western half is actually sandy sand mcsandypants. But, yeah, not a huge problem, but how would they justify fast travel by carriage (for hard core RPers like myself). It's not fun nor easy to take a carriage through the desert. But, I suppose they could, in fact, say "Oh yeah, just go hop a carriage through the desert as yer skin burns to a crisp." Okay, now I'm just nitpicking. It's probably a good setting. NEXT!

The second, least likely, and my personal favoirte option (notice I'mma try to sell it to you really hard) Morrowind.

Morrowind, home of the Dunmer, Morag Tong, and Third Installment of the Series! In fact, it's for that very reason it's not very likely.

Pros of Morrowind-

Do you remember that amazing, nostalgic feeling you got the first time you set the Dragonborn's feet down in Solstheim, all those memories rushing back to your head. Yeah, well that's cool, but imagine this. You re-emmerge from the dank prison you've been kept in to see the land of Morrowind, torn apart from its core. The Red Mountain erupting ash upon you as you step out, its firey spectacle blinding you. Okay, I tried to write something there, but it would have turned into the Elder Scrolls Movie's screenplay had I continued. Anyway, imagine returning to Morrowind, the Great Houses all struggling for control as a new Great War approaches. And fighting the Aldmeri at Red Mountain, just try and tell me that wouldn't be the best thing ever! Not to mention it would be quite the different environment from when we last saw it more than 200 years ago. Also, VIVEC REMASTERED GIVES ME WET DREAMS AT NIGHT!

What? No not the half naked False God/Chimer/Dunmer... Heheh, heh, hheeeeeeeehhhhhhhhh.

Cons of Morrowind-

Exluding the biggy that three installments back took place on a large subsection of here, there is but one problem. But it's a biggy too. Unfortunately, Dragonborn may have ruined it for us. Not the character(s), no, the DLC. Unfortunately this DLC gave us a glimpse of Morrowind too soon, which may just be the exact thing we needed, it was in fact just an allusion to the next installment, but alas, no. No, there's no chance we're going back very soon. But, as I mentioned earlier, Vvardenfell was where TES3 took place, not the whole province, which can give us hope that they'll explore the whole place. This could also give way to a boating system, that, if done right, can add a con to the list!

The third option, Black Marsh.

Black Marsh, home of the Argonian race, Swamps, and maybe even a Shadowscale if we get lucky.

Pros of Black Marsh-


Aside from FUCKING LIZARDS, this setting could offer us quite the Dark Brotherhood questline about the extinction of the Shadowscales, as well as the devotion to Sithis, possibly leading to them pleading for Sithis to save the Shadowscales, and bless a virgin Argonian with a Shadowscale hatchling. Probably not, but we can dream (side note: I am not a Christian, but I couldn't think of anything else). Aside from that, the Marshes of Black Marsh, and yes Black Marsh now comes with extra Marshes, would be quite an adventure to explore and have fun with, not to mention Argonian diplomacy and aristocracy. Have fun in Black Marsh prison, delinquents.

Cons of Black Marsh-

Assuming that the next game will revolve around the Dominion, it's a safe bet that this place is off the list. Mainly because the Elves would want to stay the hell away from this place. To be honest, can you blame them. Altmer brought up in the Summerset Isles are used to happiness, rainbows, butterflies, well to do lives, and sunny plains of bright green grass, and would never set foot in a land of wet, damp, hellish, dark, poverty-stricken swamp. Plus, can you see this as the battefront to the Great War? I really can't.

The fourth and fifth (if you don't get the reference, you aren't well versed in the sense of these games, and therefore should not be here), both combined into one little section, Cyrodiil and Skyrim. Obviously, the homes of the Imperial and Nord races, as well as goat cheese wedges.

Now, I won't even waste my time making pros and cons sections, I'm just gonna say it. Not gonna happen. Sure, they both make tons of sense as battefronts for the Great War, and it'd be cool to see Cyrodiil remastered after what the Great War has done to it, but it was visited too shortly ago. Same goes for Skyrim. Sorry everybody, these are outta the question. Maybe I'll put up some pros and cons just for the fun of it later, but not now.

The sixth candidate, and another quite likely one, is the Summerset Isles!

Home of the Altmer, tons of magic, and the Psijic Order, the Summerset Isles are islands of happiness, rainbows, butterflies, well to do lives, and sunny plains of bright green grass.

Pros of the Summerset Isles-

The Summerset Isles are the homefront of the Aldmeri Dominion, so it's an obvious battleground for the war. Plus, mages and spellshields would thrive like hell here, the land of magicka! Not to mention all the happiness, rainbows, butterflies, well to do lives, and sunny plains of bright green grass. It really is a nice place for an Elder Scrolls game to be set.

Cons of the Summerset Isles-

Well, in my mind, the Summerset Isles just feel too happy for decapitations and massive bloodshed. And that's not even factoring in the fact that they're FUCKING ISLANDS! You'd have to add a boating mechanic (which could be a pro if done right), as well as the fact that it's insanely unrealistic that a whole ship of Resistance soldiers were able to infiltrate the homefront of the Dominion, so there couldn't be large scale battles without huge amounts of preparation. But, to be optimistic here, it would be pretty cool to join an underground division of the Great Army of Cyrodiil/Hammerfell/Skyrim/Maybe Some Sorta Alliance, where the whole questline is espionage and intrigue to make preparations for the great battle to end the Dominion.

The seventh potential setting is going to be Elsweyr!

The home of Khajiit, litter boxes, and jungles. Also, before we go on I'd like to point out something not many people seem to notice in my experience. Elsweyr, the Khajiit homeland with such great lore around it, think about the name. Elsweyr. Elsewhere. Bethesda was so desperate for a name they just called this place elsewhere. "Where is Elsweyr?" "Well, not in Cyrodiil, or the Isles, nor Valenwood or Morrowind... Well, it must be elsewhere." This is when a Monty Python reference should come in. "GET ON WITH IT!!!"

Pros of Elsweyr-

Meow. Nuff said.

But I'll say more! Skooma. Drug trade would be insanely fascinating, as well as finally learning the secrets of Khajiiti culture!

Cons of Elsweyr-

A jungle may not be the optimal setting for large scale battles against a strict totalitarian government with a massive army. Also, Elsweyr is in fact under the Dominion, meaning that it wouldn't friendly to, let's be honest, MOST PLAYERS. Plus, the average brain probably could not keep track of all the Khajiiti culture and war plan all at once, and would end up accidentally drawing out the tactics of culminating well distilled skooma.

The eighth, which I will brush off as well is Valenwood.

The home of Bosmer, treehouses, and archery.

I'm gonna brush this one off kind of like Skyrim and Cyrodiil, being that Valenwood would be not only too huge a deviation from Skyrim, but would also make it impossible for a Great War storyline. Maybe if they did Elsweyr, the Isles, and this, then it would be a cool Downfall of the Dominion spy storyline, but that seems unlikely at this point in time.

The ninth province is High Rock.

By the Nine, how I want this to be the one. Finally, my character, the pureblood Breton (a subrace I made up that has no Elf blood) all rounder could finally come home! High Rock is the the home of the Bretons, ancient magic, and Daggerfall, a beautiful and fantastic city that has appeared in The Elder Scrolls Online most recently, but also in TES 1 and 2.

Pros of High Rock-

It's fucking High Rock. It's amazing, it's got several different climate ranges from snowy tundras to grassy plains, and the Bretons and their ancient magic reside there. Not to mention that their government is top notch, making for some awesome intrigue and quests.

Cons of High Rock-

I may be a little blinded here, but I really see none beside it was the setting of TES 2, which was forever ago (and by that I mean the 90s). I mean, it's got plenty of room for awesome battles with the Dominion, it has to have some presence of the Dominion and Resistance, who are forced to live side by side, kind of like KotOR's Manaan, where the government forces the two opposing forces to live peacefully together in order for them to get what they want, when in this sense they'd be competing for High Rock's allegiance, which YOU'd take part in making! I love High Rock, and I truthfully think it's about time to return to the beautiful the place the Bretons call home.

And no, Orsinium, home of the Orsimer, does not count as a province here. We'll include it with High Rock since it was originally part of High Rock plus it'll add an Orc presence to gain the allegiance of, kind of like the Boomers in Fallout: New Vegas. A distant tribe who deny connections to the outside, but you need their help to win your war effort.

Well, that's all for today everyone! Hope you've enjoyed, and leave me a comment saying which province you'd like to see the next Elder Scrolls take place in! I'm Chalupa Batman, and welcome to Jackass. (Also, if someone could remind me how to leave my signature, it would be appreciated.)