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DubiousPeddler

aka FishySalesman

  • I live in my ex-wife's new boyfriend's basement.
  • I was born on May 9
  • My occupation is nothing. I am a freeloader.
  • I am a failure.
  • DubiousPeddler

    Now, you're probably wondering why there's barely anything here. For the short story, technical shizzle-wizzle, and I'm lazy.

    Long story, it's so flippin' long that I had to write it in an entirely different file format that the wiki doesn't support and a whole bunch of other garbage. So, I've got a golden link here for the story. Voila!... Just kidding, here .

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  • DubiousPeddler

    Flerp.

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  • DubiousPeddler

    There's a civil war going on in Skyrim right now, and stuffs going down. Here's a basic overview.

    Once upon a time, a bunch of high elves got really jelly of Tie-bird September and decided to denounce him as a god. The nerds of Pierim got so flippin furious, that this guy named Ulfunk Sniffcoke got really stoned one night and decided to rebel with these famous words.

    "Teh rul off teh epire is ovar. Dem elfs ce'nt stahp us ferm warsheepping ar wermengering dety. We well stert bah kellin dah cowerd Hi Keng Turtwig! Lol, am sew stoned."

    The next day, Ulfunk regained his senses and felt really bad for waging war against the Empire. He went outside to ask his general Gluemar Stoned-Face to call his men back. In his stoned condition, Gluemar just w…

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  • DubiousPeddler

    You know that one game no one plays? Arena? Yeah, this is what happened in that game.

    So, this guy named Jagger Yarn was taking a walk when he was like.

    "Am tyerd off meh jab az a prest-maje in Carmlawn. I got da mooves liek Jagger, I shud becum eperer."

    Jagger got in his car and drove to Mournhold whilst blasting vulgar rap music through his radio and pulled over next to Barenziah, who was shopping at the time. He rolled down his windows, and winked at Barenziah while giving her a winning smile. He then opened the door and stepped out on the street. Everyone in Mournhold surrounded him and they all instantly broke into dance, Jagger Yarn singing "I got the moves like Jagger" to her. Barenziah was instantly wooed and jumped into the car with …

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  • DubiousPeddler

    Fishy on: The Tribunal

    December 24, 2013 by DubiousPeddler

    So, as many of you know, there is this thing called the Tribunal. It's a complicated thing, so let's get a bit more in depth with it.

    Long ago, in a galaxy far, far away, there was this dwarf king guy named Thorin, or something similar. We'll call him Thorin for now. So, one day Thorrin was taking a walk in his private volcano that he brought in an auction on Beezid.com for 10% of what it's worth. The volcano was located in Gardensmell as mentioned in a previous blog. Anyways, Gimrin tripped over his beard and fell into a pit and couldn't believe what he saw. It was the liver of Porkhan, kicked into the volcano by Pear-iel! Gimrin was like:

    "I do believe that tapping into the liver of this deity shall grant me enough energy to power the auto…

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